This is the handiwork of the infamous Leon who posted it
on today on rec.jewish.humor.
=====

When Queen Elizabeth heard rumors that Parliament was
planning to tax the royal family on the same basis as private
individuals, she began searching for a good tax advisor. She
asked several billionaires and each whispered, "Max Pincus".
She turned to the Intelligence services to locate Max Pincus
and received a report. Max, the report said, lives in Brooklyn,
New York where he makes a living betting on horses at OTB.
However, the report went on, there are rumors about Max making
huge fees as an unregistered tax advisor. But since he is a
heavy contributor to both political parties, the IRS and the
rest of the government leaves him alone.

Through her embassy, it was arranged for Max to travel to
London on a RAF transport and meet with the Queen secretly.
"Have your husband and your accountant there," Max e-mailed.

At the palace, Max pored over the Queen's complicated
financial reports. Since she was known to be the richest woman
in the world, Max took his time reading every paper. Finally,
after two days of reading and questioning, he sat down with the
Queen, Prince Philip and two chartered accountants.

"Foist," Max said, "because I got a Brooklyn accent, I will
speak slowly. However, there are some woids better said
in Yiddish, so if I use any, axe me fer a translation, but it
won't be as good."

"Queenie, you should shtup some gelt into trust funds for the
aineklach. Forever you ain't gonna live and the inheritance
taxes will fressen up your estate vi a chazzer. Next, you
should write out of your will that shmegegi, your son Charles.
He has enough estate to feed the Weimeraner he married and
he ain't gonna have no more kids."

"Then you should move your tuchus and quickly set up a
couple trusts for any charities you want to help." But before
he could continue, Prince Philip interrupted. "I say. I would
prefer if you would speak English. And I must insist on more
respect when addressing her majesty."

Elizabeth turned to the Prince and, with a withering glance,
said, "Phillip, please stop the narishkeit and let Mr. Pincus
proceed. He obviously has the sechel I need to cover my ass."
===

Translation by Dick Adams:
--------------------------
"Queenie, you should stash some cash into trust funds for
da grandkids. Forever you ain't gonna live and the
inheritance taxes will eat up your estate like a pig.
Next, you should write that putz, your son Charles,
out of your will, He has enough estate to feed that
hunting dog* he married and he ain't gonna have no
more kids - at least not with her. Then set up
some trusts for any charities you help. On that you
gonna wanta move your ass quickly."

With that Prince Philip had had ebough and abruptly
interrupted. "I say. While I would prefer if you
would speak proper English, I must insist you show
more respect when addressing Her Majesty the Queen."

Elizabeth glanced at the Prince and, in a scolding tone,
said, "Phillip, knock off your pompous shtick and let
Mr. Pincus continue. Can't you see he's got da smarts
I'm gonna need to cover my tooch?"

Dick

* Refer to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Weimeraner

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